The honest writings of someone trying to bridge the gap between Christianity and mental illness
We need never shout across the spaces to an absent God. He is nearer than our own soul, closer than our most secret thoughts. A. W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God I read those words yesterday morning and did little more than agree with them and marvel at the language Tozer uses throughout The Pursuit … Continue reading Closer Than Your Next Breath: How Self-Reliance Spits in the Face of Grace
On the rare mornings I feel too much, my heart slams itself against my trachea and the world nestles hard on my esophagus. It is not unlike a hummingbird flinging itself against a still, sharp, rain-washed window. On the rare mornings I feel too much, my breathing collapses upon itself, repeatedly, like someone squeezing my … Continue reading On the Rare Mornings I Feel Too Much
Step 1: Befriend someone and study her like scientists examine microscopic organisms beneath the ocean's surface. Learn her likes, dislikes, if she hates her parents and why. Step 2: After learning that she's a loner looking for simple companionship, start eroding her carefully constructed walls, break down bricks with warm hugs, a soft hand on … Continue reading The Art of Sexual Grooming
~For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who observe it begin to ridicule him, saying, "This man began … Continue reading Deconstructing Christianity- The Cost of Saying Yes
Dear Lovelies, It's 4:08 in the morning as I type this. The reason I'm up this early is that I was thinking of the past few years of my life, as it relates to thorns in my flesh. I was thinking about the conversation I had with my friend, and how we agreed that it … Continue reading A Diagnosis is NOT a Life Sentence
Last night, PTSD won. I spent most of the night curled up in my closet, like a child afraid of the Boogeyman, trying my best to be as small as possible, like nothing at all, because the amount of open space my room offered was too much. Around 11 p.m., I laid on the floor … Continue reading Travailing through Trauma: A Night With PTSD
Last night, PTSD won. I spent most of the night curled up in my closet, like a child afraid of the Boogeyman, trying my best to be as small as possible, like nothing at all, because the amount of open space my room offered was too much. Around 11 p.m., I lied on the floor … Continue reading Travailing through Trauma: A Night With PTSD
When your neurologist tells you, at 14, that you have cerebral palsy, thank her for giving you the long-awaited answer to the problem you couldn't name. When you later realize that the diagnosis came 13 years too late, do not spend all of your sixth period advanced algebra math class wondering why you weren't sick … Continue reading Diagnosis 2005
