Your Support System isn’t Your Therapist, Your Therapist isn’t Superman

Dear Lovelies, It's time for some tough love and hard truth pills. Here's the reality of the situation: Your support system isn't your therapist; your therapist isn't Superman. We all know recovery isn't linear and there are ups and downs, twists and turns, and even resting places on this journey. There will be days when … Continue reading Your Support System isn’t Your Therapist, Your Therapist isn’t Superman

The Danger of Spiritualizing Mental Illness

It's 2018 and I'm already dealing with misinformed people who refuse be open-minded, or acknowledge the error of their ways and wish to place judgement on others because of preconceived notions and prejudices. An old friend of mine and I got into a fight/disagreement last night because of some of my blog posts, or namely, the … Continue reading The Danger of Spiritualizing Mental Illness

What No One Tells You after a Suicide Attempt (Part 2)

*If you're interested in reading Part 1, click here* When you're filling out paperwork, after being hospitalized, and the personnel asks you if wanted to die, if you really meant to jump, do not tell her the truth; they'll only use it against you to keep you locked up longer. When you tell the unfeeling … Continue reading What No One Tells You after a Suicide Attempt (Part 2)

Panic Attack Hangover: The Aftermath

When most people think of panic attacks, a certain image comes to mind. Maybe it's one of someone sitting on the floor in a far corner, or on a chair bent over, hands over their ears, or on their head, hyperventilating and struggling to breathe normally. For some, that's the case. But nobody ever talks about … Continue reading Panic Attack Hangover: The Aftermath

Being in a State of Unicorn

Yesterday, J., my therapist, suggested, in the middle of a conversation, that I write down every emotion I was afraid to face and name while going through this process, this balancing act, of belief. The first thing I wrote down was "confused". That one came too easily, followed by more expected feelings like "emptiness" and … Continue reading Being in a State of Unicorn

Writing in the Midst of a Flashback

6 A.M. A nurse disturbs my nightmares, and temporarily prevents me from my ritual of staring at the wall upon sweating myself awake, to take my vitals. She wants to make sure I’m still alive, even though, by virtue of this place, I am considered one of the walking dead. 7 A.M. I try to … Continue reading Writing in the Midst of a Flashback

There’s More to Life than Trauma

  Trauma has a way of disrupting and contorting everything so that all one sees is pain, paranoia, danger, and withered hope in the form of flashbacks, nightmares, panic attacks, intrusive memories, and a flight/fight/freeze brain system in need of major repair. But that's not all there is. There's hope and love, still. And the … Continue reading There’s More to Life than Trauma

Reflections on Being Institutionalized

Sometimes, I wonder if I’m doing life correctly. Because of PTSD, I tend to live the past a lot. It’s unintentional, due to flashbacks, triggers, and panic attacks, but it happens. I have a lot of trouble with being still and clearing my mind because people, responsibilities, and distractions are all vying for my attention. … Continue reading Reflections on Being Institutionalized